The Adventures of Bob Patterson

Beale Street, Memphis

I have just returned from 10 days of work-related travel. Part of the travel was in-state while the majority was at a tech conference in Memphis Tennessee. The above photo was from a few nights ago and was taken on Beale Street.

This post will be in three parts: 1) The money pit, 2) Random travel/work musings and 3) martial arts.

The Money Pit:

During my travel adventures the money pit in Corndogland sold! The buyer, for lack of a better description, is batshit crazy. Due to her antics we had 6 weeks of counter-proposals. Were it not for the distance and our shitty realtor (maybe the subject of a separate post) we would have pulled out. However, we really needed to sell the house and were finally able to. Here’s a laundry list of the buyer’s antics:

• Had the roof inspected four times (once by our inspector and three times by hers)
• After we agreed to replace the furnace (and did) she accused us of “painting” it to look new. Sending her the bill of sale fixed her delusion.
• Went back and forth on the AC. Her inspector said it was not cooling properly whereas the technician we sent out did. On this one we got her to back down.
• Accused our realtor of forging our signatures. We had everything notarized and sent via fax. We also mailed the originals so this was untrue.
• Her realtor got so fed up with her that he did not show up at close. Instead he stuck the task on some new realtor. At close she was reported to have made numerous inappropriate comments throughout the process. I guess it’s a good thing we were not there and dealt with this from a distance.

Travels:

I was gone way too long but it was unavoidable. The in-state travel was political and related directly to my profession. The out-of-state travel not as much. Still, due to certain projects at work, I found myself attending an IT conference in Memphis Tennessee!

• I thought about not saying this because it will offend some, however, I just do not care for the South. In fairness, those of you that do, probably do not like other parts of the country. It is what it is. Also note that I exclude Texas and Oklahoma from my negative bias.
• The IT conference was good and I saw a lot of parallels between IT and my profession. However, in all honesty, most of what I was there for I already knew.
• I realized that when I hit the ground on Monday I’m going to have to delegate more.
• Unless you are a blues or Elvis fan Memphis is overrated IMO.
• Beale Street is a poor-man’s version of Bourbon Street. The police cordon off about four blocks and you can freely stagger with your alcohol, if you so choose.
• The Entertainment District must have been hit hard by the economic downturn. Indianapolis, a comparable city, has shopping, clubs, food, culture, and sports all in walking distance. Memphis not so much. Many of the stores were boarded up, the nearest movie theater was 20 minutes away and there is very little shopping besides crappy tourist traps.
• Memphis barbecue rocks but after a few days it gets old, fast.
• Enough with the goddamn Elvis already!
• Due my status, and the fact that I was operating outside of my profession, I did no staggering. I visited the hotel bar for a cocktail each night but that’s about it. I did walk Beale Street one evening but I did so stone cold sober and alone.

Here’s a few more Memphis photos. Note that the Chinese statues were being sold in a fancy hotel shop. Where it not for their price I might have purchased one.

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Martial Arts:

Before my travels I was able to visit the local Krav Maga school. Pros: A taekwondo school that incorporates ground work and other martial arts into the curriculum. Aside from TKD and MMA they have a legitimate Krav Maga track with certification. They even send instructors to the annual Karate College in Radford, VA.

Cons: Their training is intense and expensive. I saw a belt testing for a Krav student and part of it was practically a glorified beating that ended on the ground in a dog pile. Given the nature of some of my old injuries I’m just not sure it’s worth $80 a month.

Aikido: Next Sunday I’m going to try and visit the local Aikido dojo. If I like what I see I most likely will pick up in November where I left off in Corndogland.

I was not happy how my first foray into Aikido ended. Due to the travel time I did not attend near enough. Also, the instructor whose class best fit into my schedule was awful. Those problems aside, I saw a lot of martial and philosophical lessons that I’d like to drink deeper of.

We shall see.

Don’t be cruel!

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